Monday, October 20, 2008

Peter "Makes" Dinner

Yeah, tonight while Amber had chicken cordon bleu, this is what happened at my house.
At about 5:00 I tell Peter that Grandpa is going to my parents for dinner. I was about to ask him for dinner suggestions, when he said he wanted to use the hamburger patties in the freezer.
I say, "Great, I'll leave dinner up to you."
He says, "That's fine." Then he asks if we have cheese.
"No. And we don't have buns either, but dinner is up to you and I know you can do it."
Then he asks, "Do we at least have nacho cheese?" Hmm this sounds interesting. I check and tell him we do.
He agrees to make dinner and I go back to reading my latest book. I try to give him time. I waited till a little after 7:00 and still heard no signs of life, let alone dinner.
Finally he comes into our room where I'm reading my book.
I ask him, "How's dinner coming?"
"I don't know what to make."
I take a deep breath, trying to forget how I hadn't eaten since ten this morning. "You said you wanted hamburger patties."
"Yeah, but we don't have buns." He says this like I hadn't already pointed it out.
"Well, see if there is any French onion soup you can cook them with. You don't need buns for that."
He leaves for about ten minutes then comes back.
"Did you find the Onion Soup?"
He replies, "No. I don't know what it looks like."
Then I say, "It comes in a can."
He kind of grumbles. Then I say,"If you don't find that then get some cream of mushroom soup to cook the hamburgers with and we'll use the rest of the rice from last night."
Then, in a desperate voice, "Let's just go to Sonic."
I tell him how that is not cost effective and that he can make dinner, I trust him.
"But I'm so hungry now." Again, he's desperate.
I take a deep breath trying to not tell him what I'm thinking which is, "Well so am I and if you started it two hours ago when you said you would, we wouldn't have this problem" Again, I didn't say it. Instead I said, "I think there is some Pizza in the freezer."
He gives a victory smile and I hear him go to the freezer in the garage. At least he's making it, right?
So then about fifteen minutes later I come out to see if it's ready. The oven is preheated, the pizza out of the box, but he is just staring at the pizza as if it is some foreign object.
"Why isn't the pizza in the oven?"
"I don't know where the pan to put it on is."
I ask, "Did you read the directions? You put it directly into the oven."
Finally I give up. I take the wrapper off the pizza and put it in the oven, but he is still in charge. Normally, I set the timer on the oven, but he sets a timer on his watch. I go back to my book. I come out one time to ask him how long it had been in there. It had been twelve minutes and it needed to be in there for twenty. I go back to my book, wondering, "Would he dare not tell me that it's ready? Would he eat it by himself?"
So I think he probably will just eat first and then tell me it's ready, 'cause he is so hungry. I waited for a long time. Finally when I finish a chapter, I go and ask, "Is the pizza ready?"
Peter looks at his watch, "Oh shoot, it's been thirty minutes."
So, I run to the oven and take it out while he hovers over me.
I slice the pizza and get out the plates, and after it cooled a little, we ate it and it wasn't really burned.
So here's the kicker. I finish the last page of my book, and Peter comes in to watch Heros.
I say, somewhat mindlessly, "Thanks for making dinner."
"You're welcome."
And then it hits me, I made dinner. I thought of pizza, I unwrapped the pizza, I put the pizza in the oven, I took it out, and I sliced it.
Is it just me, or do guys like to take credit for things they don't do? However, in talking to him, I realize he honestly does think he made dinner.


B.K. Stanley said...

Eileen, I am so sorry. it was hilarious to read but would have been incredibly frustrating to live.

Kristin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Amber Rae said...

Ha! Pete's hilarious! I remember my dad once cleaning the bathroom and it turning into something like that.

Rebekah said...

Ha ha ha!! That was hilarious! Ben lucks out on the dinner thing since he usually doesn't get home until after I'd like to have eaten but I'm sure it would turn out quite similarly with frozen pizza that I end up slicing and serving. Funny how he thinks he really did make dinner.

Kristin said...

Yeah, it was my comment and everyone already read it. But. . I repent. I have to say, Tim is AWESOME in the kitchen, as his family all knows. He is far more skilled than I am. My dad said I would never find a guy who didn't love sports or who could cook. Sorry Dad, I proved you wrong. He is like that when it comes to helping around the house with cleaning chores.

Neener Dog said...

Yeah, Kristin, I know your rule. No bad mouthing the husband to anyone, even a little. Thanks for making me feel guilty :-) Actually Peter can make really good food, when he feels like it and I was actually just happy that he was willing to do it. I actually thought the whole experience was more endearing than frustrating. I think it's cute that he thinks he did something. That sounds condesending, but I don't mean it that way.